Earlier this month, I had the pleasure of speaking to Joanne Lipman, a bestselling author who’s been editor-in-chief of a few publications you may be familiar with, like USA Today, The Wall Street Journal Weekend Journal, and Conde Nast Portfolio.
Joanne has a terrific new book out called Next!: The Power of Reinvention in Life and Work, in which she talks to hundreds of people who have made successful career pivots, as well as researchers who study this sort of thing.
Through her research, she stumbled upon a pattern that all career transitions seem to follow. She calls this the 4 S’s—search, struggle, stop, solution.
I summarized the process in a story I wrote recently for Entrepreneur.com. You can read it here.
Joanne found that one of the key instigators of successful career reinventions is what she calls the “expert companion.”
This is a friend, spouse, teacher, family member, co-worker, or pet, who believes in you and gives you a little, helpful nudge into the scary unknown.
“Very often it takes somebody else to recognize skills you don't realize you have, strengths you don't realize you have, to give you that encouragement and confidence,” Joanne says.
Barefoot Contessa
Joanne told me the story of Ina Garten, whose Barefoot Contessa empire of cookbooks, gourmet shops, and a TV show has earned her around $68 million.
But without her expert companion, Garten might still be wearing shoes.
Ina had a job as a nuclear budget analyst at the White House, but she was bored out of her mind. On the weekends, she would cook Julia Child recipes for her friends. Her husband Jeffrey, who worked at the State Department, saw that her passion was with food, not numbers.
When the opportunity arose for Garten to purchase a tiny gourmet food store in Long Island called Barefoot Contessa, Jeffrey encouraged her to go for it.
He said, “You love cooking. You have a passion for this that I don't see in your day job,” Joanna explains. “It was that nudge that allowed her to take that jump. He was clearly her expert companion.”
As Garten would explain later in an interview with Katie Couric, “It just takes one person who believes in you. For me, that was Jeffrey, and my whole life turned around.”
Breaking out of a rut
Sometimes it’s hard to make a big change all by your lonesome. You need help.
“Sometimes we’re just stuck in our own heads, endlessly thinking and cogitating and daydreaming but unable to figure out if we’re making the correct decision,” writes Joanne. “That’s where an expert companion can make the difference. We all need someone who can hear our concerns and clarify our goals and decisions.”
Expert companions are also excellent at helping you identify your strengths and passions when those might not be as obvious to you.
Finding an expert companion
Sometimes your expert companion is obvious, but other times you might be looking around and wondering who the hell you talk to about this crazy idea you have.
Here’s the good news: Joanne says an expert companion doesn’t have to give advice to be effective.
“Their most important contribution may be to simply listen,” she writes. “When we have a goal in mind but don’t articulate it, it’s easy to let it slide. But when we share that goal with someone else, we suddenly feel more accountable.”
She points to a 2015 study that found that more than 70% of those who sent weekly updates to a friend completed their goals.
Expert companions can also be invaluable in helping us unearth our strengths.
Many people know they want to make a big change in their life, but they’re unsure what it should be. Sometimes, it helps to see yourself through your expert companion’s eyes.
“I learned a huge lesson that when you're taking stock of what you ought to be doing with your life, talk to somebody who has watched you in action and ask them what they think your strengths are,” Cindi Stivers told Joanne in her book.
Cindi is the former editor-in-chief of Time Out New York and now works for TED.
“I had skills that were so second nature to me. I didn't value them,” she said.
For example, after my interview with Joanne, she complimented my interviewing skills. I mention this not to brag (although God, I’m good) but to prove the value of expert companions.
Joanne suggested I write a book on how to interview people. I had never thought of myself as someone who might have authority in interviewing, much less the expertise to write an entire book on the topic. To me, interviewing is just something I’ve done my entire career. All I’m doing is asking questions and listening carefully to the answers.
But having someone with Joanne’s experience tell me that it might be a unique skill set caused me to reflect on myself in a new way. Maybe a book on interviewing is a path I should pursue.
Could this be my Barefoot Jon moment?
Let me know what you think.